Belonging...

Right now i am in Melbourne, sipping on an iced chocolate frappe in my hotel room after spending an amazing day with an awesome bunch of like minded people exploring the idea of contextualisation of the gospel in different cultural settings. I still have three more days to go of this course, and yet already the past two sessions have flipped some of my views and challenged my thoughts greatly. You'd think i'd have done enough of this already lately- but turns out i still have SO MUCH to learn... about missions, about Yawo (and other) cultures, about God... It is certainly making me think more, and the more i do, the more passionate i become about wanting to go and work cross culturally. And that freaks me out a tiny bit. On one hand i am loving what i'm learning and want to use this in a practical sense, and on the other hand i don't know what that will look like; as a single young woman... as a student...with no specific skills as such... and i'm sure there are heaps of other factors that weigh in! i know it's ok to not know the future and we can find peace in that, but what happens if we're passionate or have a desire for something and it doesn't seem feasible for where we are at, at this present time and possibly in the future as well?

I'm afraid i'm doing a bit of deep-thinking at the moment. It's probably got a lot to do with my recent experience of the term "belonging". When i left the team in Mozambique i knew i no longer would 'belong' there. I am no longer experiencing life with them. I love the team, i love a lot of the people who live there and i loved learning about and being in the culture. Now though, my life is in Perth. But then trying to fit back in and belong in Perth is a struggle too. Of course i'm surrounded by gorgeous friends and family and am so grateful for that... But how do i adjust and belong here as i did just last year?
Maybe that is not possible? Maybe you can't just slot back into your old position once you've changed and everything around you has changed as well.

I feel homesick. But where is my home? Mozambique? Malawi? Australia?

But even in this very slight struggle i'm dealing with now as i learn to readjust to this new season i am in, i recognise i am very blessed and really have nothing to complain about. And i've only been out of the country for 9 months- what is that time in the scheme of things? Nothing really. "Suck it up" I can almost hear people say to me! I read friends posts who are living in such different cultures to their own and hear what they have to deal and cope with and i am so encouraged by their perseverance. We can learn so much from these people and it's a joy to see the strength and courage God gives them as they daily surrender to Him. It makes me sing with joy knowing God is bigger than us all. That Jesus has gone before us and has given us hope. That we can share His love, His grace, His mercy, healing and power with those around us. That we can speak to Him and that the Holy Spirit will intercede for us and make our prayers known. That he hears our cries. Hallelujah!

1 Peter 2:9 
But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people belonging to God, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light

Hmm maybe i need to rethink my whole idea of what belonging means.. see i told you i have so much to learn!!!!!


Thanks for reading...